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Wednesday, December 8, 2010

FINAL Same Sex Marriage Proposal

The last couple years the buzz around the country about same sex marriage has been huge; even though this topic is often surrounded by much controversy, it is very important. The problem is that we are a country primarily based on freedom and taking away an individual’s right to marry is taking away a freedom. I propose that same sex marriage be made legal.

In 1996 the federal government, under the supervision of President Bill Clinton, passed DOMA or the Federal Defense of Marriage Act, that states that a marriage is to be recognized between a man and a woman, and that another state does not need to recognize or uphold a same sex marriage. Setting this organization in place protected many opponents’ beliefs and standards. In the act it states that the words “spouse” and “marriage” will only pertain to a union between and man and woman. The act also states that no other state is required to uphold other states laws. So, what that means is that a same sex couple was to marry in Iowa then travel to Utah, Utah does not have to consider that marriage as valid.

Currently there are only 6 states/districts that have made same sex marriage legal. They are: Iowa, New Hampshire, Massachusetts, Connecticut, Vermont, and Washington D.C. 6 states allow domestic partnerships, they are: Washington State, Oregon, Nevada, California, Hawaii, and Maine. 2 states allow civil unions, they are: New Jersey, and Illinois.

The hype around the passing of Proposition 8 in California has been huge. The clause would allow the California Constitution to state that “Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California” After the passing of the clause on November 5, 2008 the hype about same sex marriage was intensified. Supporters of the clause argued religion, education, adoption, and tax rights. People against the clause argued equality and unfair treatment, and financial and tax privileges.

First I will talk about the opponent’s arguments. Education: The argument is that if the law proposition 8 is passed that educational institutions will have to teach that same sex marriage is indeed normal and acceptable, and is in every way equal as traditional marriage between a male and female. Adoption: If Proposition 8 is not passed adoption agencies would be forced to serve all same sex couples. Religion: Clergymen and religious people argue from the Bible stating that the foundations of marriage are based solely on a man and a woman. Also, they are worried that religious sects may be accused of hate crimes if they reject or choose to not allow a same sex couple to hold ceremonies in their buildings. Tax Rights: Some religious institutions are worried that they will lose their tax exemption status. Also there are concerns that there will be people that take advantage of the tax benefits that married couples receive.

Here are the weak points in those arguments. Education: In an ever increasing dynamic country, we should educate our children on all things. In order to have well rounded, un-sheltered children that are ready for every issue and topic, we need to teach them, or introduce them to it. I do not believe that it is any schools responsibility or feel it’s necessary to teach “right” or “wrong” concerning this topic. But, presenting that there are same sex couples and that marriage is a union and partnership formed between two people is just stating and teaching a fact, and better preparing children for the world that is around them. The Education Code itself also reads: “Family health and child development, including the legal and financial aspects and responsibilities of marriage and parenthood.” Nothing states that it will be required to define marriage as what it is or what is right or wrong. It is also always the parent’s choice to withdrawal their child or children from any course or classroom where they do not agree with the course content or criteria.

Adoption: Denying a same sex couple the opportunity to raise a child is unfair, and infringes on those couples constitutional rights. There are many same sex couples that are more fortunate than heterosexual couples and can provide a life and environment that would be wonderful for a child. Using this as a reason for why someone should not be allowed to adopt a child is like saying that all single parent children are less likely to succeed. These statistics do not take every couple or situation into account. Same sex couples should be treated equally. Thousands upon thousands of children go without homes each year. More agencies offering options to homosexual males and females would offer a way to reduce this number. This would leave us with less children in the system and more children with loving homes. The Child Welfare League of America had this to say: “Applicants should be assessed on the basis of their abilities to successfully parent a child needing family membership and not on their race, ethnicity or culture, income, age, marital status, religion, appearance, differing lifestyles, or sexual orientation.” As quoted by CWL position statement on same sex marriage (2000). They also list in the article a statement issued by the American Psychological Association; the statement says: “Existing research comparing lesbian and gay parents to heterosexual parents, and children of lesbian and gay parents to children of heterosexual parents, shows that common negative stereotypes are not supported (Patterson, 1995). Likewise, beliefs that lesbian and gay adults are unfit parents have no empirical foundation” (American Psychological Association, 1995)

Religion: A very sensitive topic for many people. Stating or basing a decision off of the Bible alone is ludicrous. If we were to live by every law or commandment that was stated in the Bible we would be sacrificing animals and getting executed for almost everything. In DEUTERONOMY 22:13-21 it says: "If it is discovered that a bride is not a virgin, the Bible demands that she be executed by stoning immediately." In LEVITICUS 15:24 "If a man lies with her and her monthly flow touches him, he will be unclean for seven days; and any bed he lies on will be unclean.” In DEUTERONOMY 21:8 it says: “If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who does not obey his father, his father shall take hold of him and bring him to the elders. They shall say, this son of ours is stubborn and rebellious he is a profligate and a drunkard. Then all the men of this town shall stone him to death” There are many things that are outdated in the Bible, and no longer apply to times today and to the way that we live our lives. There are so many things that we don't follow suit in the Bible that it is ridiculous to hold on to one passage that says that a marriage should be strictly between a woman and a man and not hold on to hundreds of other passages that require us to do equally ridiculous things. You cannot argue that the book is legitimately true and perfect when you don't follow every aspect.

Also, in the Christian religion you are taught not to judge others. That Jesus Christ and God have the final say in these matters. But, Christians everywhere have taken it upon themselves to rally together forming anti same sex marriage groups and rioting at different events. The LDS church alone has been reported to have spent more than 20 million dollars on the California Proposition 8 advertisement campaign. Recently, a group in San Francisco held signs that said homosexuals were going to hell. If you are Christian than aren’t you supposed to believe that Christ holds the ultimate judgment? Aren’t you supposed to “Love your neighbor as yourself” as it is quoted in the Bible?

The most recent controversy concerning religion is when the LDS church leader Boyd K. Packer announced in their annual meeting “General Conference” that living and practicing a gay or homosexual lifestyle is “immoral and evil”. The feedback from these statements has been heavy. Many homosexuals in Utah are outraged. Along with church members that do not agree with the words or new findings of the church concerning this topic. There is a scheduled protest October 7th regarding this particular topic. Adam (Eric) Pride in Utah Blog, Entry 1 & 2.

Tax Rights/Hate Crimes. Religious institutions will not be affected by the passing of this bill. No religion will be asked or to change its views on the topic, or be expected to perform religious ceremonies which would make them go against the teaching of their doctrine. This can be compared to the Mormon Church only allowing those members that are “endowed” and hold a current temple recommend to enter into marriage through a temple ceremony, and not allowing others that are not to view or be a part of that ceremony. Many institutions have worship areas that are not open to all the public. These instances are not considered hate crimes. In the California ruling issued on May 15th the Supreme Court actually issued a statement protecting those rights. U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker said:

“[A]ffording same-sex couples the opportunity to obtain the designation of marriage will not impinge upon the religious freedom of any religious organization, official, or any other person; no religion will be required to change its religious policies or practices with regard to same-sex couples, and no religious officiant will be required to solemnize a marriage in contravention of his or her religious beliefs.
“Marriage in the United States has always been a civil matter,” Walker continued. “Civil authorities may permit religious leaders to solemnize marriages but not to determine who may enter or leave a civil marriage. Religious leaders may determine independently whether to recognize a civil marriage or divorce but that recognition or lack thereof has no effect on the relationship under state law.” As quoted in Supreme Court Ruling. Proposition 8 Decision Respects Religious Liberty, Says AU’s Barry Lynn. Para 12.

I recently interviewed a homosexual male to get a little bit more back story behind the reasons why same sex marriage is so important to him. His name is Jaymes Myers; he is currently a teacher at the University of Utah and Salt Lake Community College. This is what he said:

“When the government withholds same sex marriage as an option for homosexual men and woman, not only are they infringing on our constitutional rights, but there are many other things that are affected by that decision. For example; currently legislation has it set up that if a loved one, or a partner in this case, is ill or sick in the hospital only family members are able to see or attend to that person. Because that is the current rule, no same sex partnership qualifies. This is a ripple effect that spans farther than just freedom. It affects or everyday lives, and relationships.”

Can you imagine what it would be like to not be able to be with your loved one or spouse at the most crucial time in your relationship? To not be able to act on their behalf if they were to pass away, to be left nothing if a will was not made. These are all realities for homosexual couples that aren’t ever really thought about.
Same sex marriage is not a new topic, it has been around for years. But, because of the hype around proposition 8 in California it has brought new light to the situation and made many more people aware.

"This is a day of immensely conflicted feelings. We are profoundly disappointed the court has upheld Proposition 8. Banning the fundamental freedom to marry for same-sex couples is unfair, unjust and flies in the face of progress occurring throughout the country, from the Iowa heartland to the rocky shores of Maine. That California is taking a step backward at this moment in history is disconcertingly out of step with society's growing support for equality, and personally painful to committed couples who will be blocked from marrying in California. It is a travesty that the court has, for the first time in California history, permitted a simple majority to use the initiative process to strip a fundamental right from a minority group." As quoted by Rea Carey, Executive Director of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force.Best Quotes of Prop 8 by Michael A Jones. Para 2.

Understanding the reason behind opponents wanting to ban same sex marriage is not the issue. Understanding why those reasons outweigh constitutional rights when we are a country primarily based on freedom is.

So, I propose that we take the steps necessary to change The Federal Defense of Marriage Act. The words “Spouse” and “marriage” should be defined as a legal union between two persons opposite sex couples and same sex couples included. And the law that says a state does not have to uphold or consider a same sex marriage valid should be stricken. I also propose for the eventual legalization of same sex marriage in all 50 states.

So where do we start on the road to change? Getting each state to pass same sex marriage would be no easy task, however it is obtainable. The first step to be made is to campaign, to educate people on the rights of individuals. To explain the importance of same sex marriage and the effects it is having on thousands of individuals. I would say that most people are ignorant in knowing the details that are in sex marriage and that it spans far greater than just a homosexual relationship. I would educate people that it is a far deeper situation. The points I would highlight are:

The Declaration of Independence: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.” Thomas Jeffereson, Declaration of Indepenence.

The very foundation that we are built upon states that all men should be given certain rights and remain equal, I would argue that a heterosexual relationship is no different than a homosexual relationship if you look at it strictly by that point. I would also argue the separation of church from state. In the first amendment it states:

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”United States Constitution, Amendment 1.

Because of the laws of separation of church and state, the reasons solely behind why a same sex partnership should not be allowed to marry are irrelevant. Our country is afraid of change. But it can be done. In 1924 a ban on interracial marriages was passed that stated that you could only marry someone that is the same skin color as you. In 1967 the law was struck down by the Supreme Court and interracial marriages became legal. The Supreme Court deemed the old law “unconstitutional”. Saying: “The freedom to marry has long been recognized as one of the vital personal rights essential to the orderly pursuit of happiness to free men, a basic civil right” Loving vs Virginia Supreme Court Case June 12, 1967.

The projected cost of something this extreme is unknown. Various fundraisers, donations, and sponsors would be needed. This would be a long and costly road. But, the outcome would be great. The moral and support of homosexuals would skyrocket, and our country would make another huge leap forward in remaining true to our roots in regards to freedom. Many people like to compare these two cases because of the similarities in the infringement of rights. It took almost 45 years for change to occur but it did happen. In an interview Mildred Loving had this to say: “I am still not a political person, but I am proud that Richard's and my name is on a court case that can help reinforce the love, the commitment, the fairness, and the family that so many people, black or white, young or old, gay or straight seek in life. I support the freedom to marry for all. That's what Loving, and living, are all about.” As quoted by Mildred Loving. Mildred Loving of Loving vs. Virginia Speaks out about Marriage Equality. By: Kathy Belge

It is my hope to see in the future to see that same sex marriage be legalized in all 50 states, that same sex partners everywhere get the freedoms that heterosexual partners are already enjoying, and that rather than stifling a very important topic because some people may not be comfortable; it is brought to light and people are educated on the importance of everyone being equal. Marriage is a human right, not a heterosexual privilege.



Works Cited
Michael A Jones. The best quotes from Prop 8’s ruling. Para 2. http://gayrights.change.org/blog/view/the_best_quotes_from_todays_prop_8_ruling
Adam (Eric). Pride in Utah. Various blog entries including 1, 2, and 3. http://prideinutah.com/
Thomas Jeffereson. Declaration of Independence. Opening Paragraph.
Rev. Mel White, co-founder of Soulforce. What the Bible Says And Doesn't Say About Homosexuality. Found (Sept 21,2010)
http://www.soulforce.org/article/homosexuality-bible-gay-christian
Same Sex Marriages, Civil Unions, & Domestic Partnerships
http://www.religioustolerance.org/hom_marr.htm
Personal Interview. Jaymes Myers.
Position Statement on Parenting of Children by Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Adults
http://www.cwla.org/programs/culture/glbtqposition.htm
Christine Vestal . Gay marriage legal in six states. WEDNESDAY, APRIL 08, 2009 . HTTP://www.stateline.org/live/details/story?contentId=347390
Kathy Beldge. Where can gays legally marry? Here’s a list of countries and states.
http://lesbianlife.about.com/cs/wedding/a/wheremarriage.htm
Proposition 8 Decision Respects Religious Liberty, Says AU’s Barry Lynn. Para 12.
http://www.au.org/media/church-and-state/archives/2010/09/proposition-8-decision.html